I am woman, therefore I am obsessed with my weight. The two go together: being a woman and being obsessed with weight, right? Okay, so maybe it isn't just because I am a woman, but it IS because I am overweight. This is exacerbated because I am very conscious of fat's ill-effects on one's health and face it - I want to look good!
I have been fighting the weight battle since I graduated high school and spent most of my twenties overweight with the exception of when I married my husband. I lost weight for my wedding but quickly gained it back. I had my first son and then ballooned to a number I will not say out loud in conversation nor will I mention it here. Finally, I decided I didn't want to begin my thirties fat. I knew that in the shape I was in, I was not living my life to its fullest.
So, I joined Weight Watchers and lost fifty pounds. And it was easy. Honestly. I remember that as the pounds came off, I was astonished at how simple it seemed. I followed the plan and walked a few times a week. That's it. After I lost it all, I never felt so good, so beautiful and so energetic. After a while, though, I did get tired of going to meetings and counting every point, so a few pounds crept back on, but they were nothing I couldn't deal with.
Another beautiful baby boy later, and I am overweight again. Not fifty pounds but still more than I should be. My son was born almost two years ago, and despite how simple it was then, it is really hard now. I can't explain it, but it is. I have rejoined WW TWICE since his birth. I just couldn't get myself to count the points and stick on plan, despite how easy I know it is.
Here I am. This entry marks a [another] new start. With my two past attempts under my belt, I won't be going the Weight Watchers route again because of seem to have developed some sort of mental inpass. It will have to be the old fashioned way: watching what I put in my mouth and getting my butt moving. By choosing to write about it here, I'm hoping it will help keep me more accountable.
I've learned certain things work for me:
1. Before I eat something that doesn't fit into the plan, thinking to myself, "Is it worth it?"
2. Walking every other day at least.
3. Drinking LOTS of water.
4. Writing down what I eat.
See, I know what works, but despite all of my knowledge and experience, this past year and a half have been a struggle. Seeing the needle on the scale go down, just to go up again makes me want to pull my hair out. I've thought about just giving up and eating whatever-the-heck I want and not care what size I end up to be. Then seconds later, I remember how great I felt when I was twenty pounds lighter and all of those clothes in the back of my closet I want to fit into again.
My excuses are many: I am too busy with the family, work, housekeeping, LIFE. When I have the time to workout, I choose to take nap because I'm tired. When I cook, I cook foods that are not necessarily healthy because I "think" they are easier or quicker to make. In my head, I know these are just excuses, but give me a chance and I can justify every one.
Really, weight loss isn't rocket science. It is easy. But, right now, why is it so hard?
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